Thursday 13 March 2008

Going to hell in a sweet bag


Sugar coating bitter lessons
I saw these treats in Smith’s today, I can’t but help but think they highlight a moral weakness at the heart of British society. In the olden days Rowntree’s fruit pastilles were randomly packed pot luck thing, you had to take your chances and eat the next one in the tube as it was revealed; be it red, black, green or even yellow.
Of course you only wanted the red and black ones but had to learn to accept the yellow and green as they gave moral balance and structure to life. Fruit pastilles were a small philosophical lesson in a paper wrapper that life isn’t easy that you have to take the rough with the smooth.
But no in this New Labour world of all shall have prizes no one needs to suffer to attain anything quick fix hoody wearing mobile phone ringtone blaring alcopop sodden xbox playing tattooed touchy feely world you can have just the red and black ones or worse still just black!
God help us if there’s ever another war

7 comments:

Mondo said...

They could as least do the decent thing and make them a limited edition - It's the same with Quality Street picking and mixing themselves and firing out large scale versions. I still miss the cracknel one from Quality St, the toffee and mallow one from Black Magic and also toffee and mallow eggs (not related)

Graham Smith said...

What about me? I never liked black ones, and actually preferred green ones. Too eager to fit around everyone else'e needs, desperate to be liked. What do I do now?

BPP said...

Greens are my favourite, too. Closely followed by the oranges and the ol' yellers. I call it 'Strawberry Cream Quality Street Syndrome', where the sufferer is cursed to like only the rubbish ones in any given box of confectionary. You'll find us skulking at sweet counters, wondering why normal folk get an enormous version of the green triangle and the purple nutty one, yet we can whistle if we think we're gettin' a giant coffee one.

That said, you are the only family member guaranteed to get a steady supply of sweets come Christmas, so every cloud ...

Anonymous said...

I liked all of them. All the flavours. And that, yer honour, is why I'm slowly becoming a fat bastard as the years groan on.

fourstar71 said...

You're all mad; Fruit Gums are, and always have been, far superior. Pfffft*.

* all the disdain I can manage with a mouthful of Fruit Gums, obviously.

BLTP said...

well Pm, BPP, swinehead, Mr g, and 4 star Hello and may be there's a Fruit pastille for everyone in the end!

Valentine Suicide said...

I bought some of these, and the lack of variety makes for a seriously limiting experience. Never again.

I love Fruit Gums as well. I've had one stuck to one of my back teeth since 1992.