enough about you let's talk about me

Paper review the Observer magazine
Front cover picture of bold bloke with mobile phone something about bono and Africa

1st page Advert for a garden kids slide for £549.
Contents page picture of crap banksy graph plus funny cartoon about Dr who
Advert for a printer

Kathryn Flett talks about herself sorry Myleen Klaas I saw her (Ms Flett) the other day she was drinking gin and tonic probably.
Barry Humphries because he’s in that extended advert for Oliver on bbc1 plus something about royal girlfriends

Advert from a watch £235 with a potter’s wheel in it
Alan Cummings and his potty mouth x2
Advert for a car £28,985
Long piece about the bald bloke with Bono , Bono is starting to look rough like he’s been on bonfire. Not read the piece good luck to them if they get rid of 3rd world debt.
Ad for Boots half price deal
Advert for camera with picture of Taj Mahal which probably looks good on your camera phone mind
Pretentious kitchen ad no price if you have to ask….
Mobile broad band for £15 a month
Ad for shoes sold by someone I use to know who was a really good bloke who worked with bad lads and hopefully has made a killing from fancy shoes
Ad for Ireland
Ad for off road car £24,305 + £400 metallic paint

Long piece of tedious art by Banksy and mates whoop de doo
In middle of Banksy ad fro Beijing Olympics by credit card main selling point the exquisite body of a beach volley ball player
Some Chelsea donkeys selling a telly
An ad for blond people in Australia
A long piece on food being dead expensive picture makes food look grim
A bed ad no price if you have to ask….
Ad for lemon ice cream

Fashion spread for denim blond model in faded lomoesque polaroidy pics looks at camera in several of them
Multi ad page for sofas and beds, fires and conservatory including the place I got mine from in Camden
The same bloke wearing 5 Macs he looks bored
Ad for lightweight jacket to be worn by people 20 years older than the model who I fancy £14.99

Fashion pages My favourite outfit Erin Mulanney 31 she’s a buying director apparently her first job was strategic consultant how can you consult on something when you’ve never done owt she looks very happy and buys things all the time she’s wearing a white hat that if I wore it would make me look like a out of work wine critic,
James May from top gear’s garage it’s hard not to like some who likes London pride and folding bikes.

Joint ad car polish £12.95 window cleaner £12.95 (use just once a year!)
Feature on 9 decks chairs £43.50 -£3,147
Nigel Slater talks about himself sorry food this week makes a chervil omelette and doesn’t eat it ,eats nettles which I’ve done he likes them more than me.
Picture of cat to sell cat food free
Advert for my favourite brand of yogurt
Jay Rayner talks about himself sorry looks smug and has his dinner with a mate.
Advert for ice cream with unsubtle global warming theme
The usual dull wine page haven’t read it in years
Advert for chinos, floors, sofas and Marquees; what the chuff who wants a marquee I use to put them up and it was shit and a bit scary
Dan Pearson has recruited Nigella and Sarah Brown as his tree planting bitches for a cancer centre garden he’s designed that’ll be talking about himself then.
Ad for folding chairs £24.99
Ad for washing up liquid
Green page Lucy Siegel who dyed her hair brown to look greener; never read this page the worlds problems won’t be solved by shopping.

Car page Polly Vernon continues to talk about herself but always looks uneasy posing in pictures as if she’s not at home drinking and shopping all day. She looks trapped Polly get in the car and drive away you never wanted this life run girl run ,drive back to your granny’s old house back to old house, find your copy of chalet ballet school adventure, write your stories about brainy show jumpers and don’t worry about what the other girls think, drinking isn’t clever….sorry where was I.
Ad for yellow car £29134
Ad for pashmina £39.50 the model looks happy and is 20 years older then the one for jackets early on.
Ad for cushions £23.50!!
Ad for Ladders
Ad Pennine futons now look ‘ere son where I cums from a futon is a direction as in “ ere flower put ya futon on this trailer to stop it running away” that or pallet int back bedroom.
The horoscope: picture of old bloke can’t be bothered to find out who he is, my horoscope says I’m to marry Winona Ryder which is nice.
Dear Mariella talks about herself in the process of helping a deeply messed up person
Ad for Bose clock radio for people who like shopping more than music, I think they are about £300 quid to play tinny mp3 on, they are a bit shit really.
Back page an ad for eBay.
80 pages in total.
here's what sup if you type "observer book of planes" into yahoo picture search, it made me laugh.