My New Car!

One careless owner, High mileage sold as seen....

I don’t know why it’s taken me so long to trek down and take some pics of this marvellous addition to south London’s armoury, (yeah watch out you cocky north bankers with your houmous bars and glamorous west end if you get too umpity we’ve got our own armoured division namely this T-34, that pink elephant with a castle on it’s back from just down the road and if you really get above your station we’ll swing round the big guns on HMS Belfast and get all 1944 on your a…… sorry were was I ,oh yes Tanks.

Just off the old Kent road just after the fly over on the northside of the road is this T-34 tank it’s a bit of local curiosity. I think some bloke bought it and put on this patch of land (as some blokes do) the council complained and tried to move it but it turns out to be his land. Anyway it get’s tagged from time to time and numpties like me take pictures of it etc.

Up close it’s really quite impressive and if it didn’t represent some thing terrible you could go on about its sculptural form etc.

This T-34 really shows the power of the tank on our imagination, from the very start they were almost mythical creatures, early cartoons show them like monsters or landships. One of tanks early proponents JFC Fuller was an acolyte of magician Aleister Crowley. Their mere appearance has cleared riot filled streets and stricken with fear protesters world wide. It’s no surprise this is one of the most recognised photos ever.

Indeed of all tanks the T-34 is one of the most mythical and most paradoxical. Because basically it gave the world freedom from fascist terror (well the men and women who drove it did with some helps form lots of other Russians and some American and English and Polish, and French and Indians and……..)

But then t-34 and its' descendents then spent 50 years being used to suppress Eastern Europe. Like I say a paradox.

Even with a rather timid cat living underneath it in the drizzle and the gloom of a Southwark autumn afternoon this tank did seem t be brooding as if the engines would cough back into life and the turret would slowly traverse as the tracks clanked forward.

By way of tune here's a live version of Tank Park Salute by Billy Bragg Mp3 live in Austrailia in 1992.

train in vain

Sorry for the rant I've had a bad late afternoon.

Bu**er the ice caps, bo***cks to sea level rising I've had it with public transport I'm buying a car.

Why? because it's too expensive, just now I checked my tickets and realised I hadn't a seat reservation for the east coast line but they can't print me another so I have to pay the full fare or pay more on the train it's my fault I thought 4 tickets for one journey was enough!

But one was receipt! so to get home I had to fork at 80 quid! I'm writing this on my new phone fold out keyboard on the train!
so we'll see if it works.
Sunday Night update
(It did) I have tidied up the spelling just a bit.
as to public transport it's a pile of crap. The punch line of today's journey is of course having shelled out £80 for a "seat reservation" not a "ticket" but "seat reservation" they never once checked any of them in fact no member of train crew came near the trolley service was cancelled and the bar was out of most things. When i got back to KX the Northern line wasn't stopping there and it took me 35-40 mins to get a bus to London Bridge where half the platforms where closed, a got a train the seat cushion next to my seat was missing and my 10 mins (max) journey to New X nearer 20 as the train just dawdled along.

My journey to work tomorrow will in-humanly cramped slow and deeply unpleasant, followed by a bus journey on bus whose seats aren't suitable for tall people like me. All of which we have to pay for.

So what sort of car should I get?

Take back the Tower

Take back the Tower
Originally uploaded by bltphoto

The Petition:

It started off as a mild interest and then became a mini obsession and now it’s time to take action.

I posted about the so called BT tower the other day. I promised some top secret plans see later post. But having done some light research into it I find that the Tower isn’t totally closed to the public no it is available for BT corporate functions and junkets.

Now I’ve nothing against the people in these pictures but hang on shouldn’t this be something more people have access to. Too much of this country is paid for by one lot of people and enjoyed by a smaller luckier bunch. I say all this as someone with chronic vertigo who would be clinging to the inner walls of the viewing deck if my journey up and round the Eye and the World Trade Centre is any thing to go by.

But do you know what I think we should take back the tower preferably at 1981 prices and open it up to everyone.

I looked into one of those Downing street petition but firstly I didn’t fancy giving Gordon Brown my personal details he’d only accidentally send them to some sky writing firm and have them fly over the opening ceremony of London Olympics showing them to the entire world or such like..
And secondly they warn you that fanciful petitions “however witty“ will be taken down so whether any of the below is the least bit funny I thought I wouldn’t waste my time. So we’ll start here and see what happens.

If you support the campaign add your agreement below you don’t have to give any names other than what you’d use round here already. I really don’t need to know where you live.

Anyway here’s the petition

The Take Back the Tower Petition
WE the undersigned earnestly request that the so-called BT tower be taken back into the bosom of public ownership and it’s doors flung open to the people* who paid for it and their off spring in perpetuity or until they bring back TOTP which is ever is first.
We petition that:
What with this sort of thing being in fashion again it’s time we spent some of our money buying back the BT tower. Once back in public ownership we would rename it the “Post Office Tower” or even better the “GPO Tower” and open up the viewing decks and get the restaurant going again.

It would probably turn a shilling or two and there should be a gift shop that must sell snow storms and GPO Tower sticks of rock; the money generated could be used to rebuild the Skylon on the South Bank and to get the British space programme out of moth balls.

The tower would once again become a hub of culture in this often overlooked area of London. There could be anniversary concerts for Joe Meek and Delia Derbyshire, Earl Brutus and whoever designed the stylophone. There could be poetry readings and tea dances and other events that local people fancy (it may be too small for majorettes or speedway). There is no reason why the public shouldn’t once again throng it’s viewing decks and nibble orange flavoured Club biscuits in it’s café.

So let’s take action now and Take Back the Tower.

*There are only 2 caveats for public funding firstly Noel Edmonds isn’t allowed anywhere near the place and neither are any rampaging giant kittens

What we've learned so far this week?

Some known facts:

That there’s never been a bad picture taken of Steve McQueen or in fact Chet Baker either!

That Peter Kay needs to write with other people to be truly funny and also TV comedy is best done in half hour slots.

That surely "Landes Banki" is the silliest named investment for grownups since “my Booky Wook” came out...

That Chinatown is the most overpriced place to eat in the centre of town, really £7.50 for some Pak choi choy!

That there’s no helping some people…. I saw on one of those internal envelopes the otherday someone had drawn smiley faces next to people’s names.

That it's worth going into "al'barone" just to try their new draught Duvel it’s probably the best lager (sorry blonde ale thanks PB) in the world. !!

That "al'barone" is a lesson in almost medieval theology; that the ecstatic highs of the beer are balanced by being ignored by the bar staff, 2 of whom stood and looked at me wiping glasses while I tried to get served, then in rolled the London’s most pissed vertical Scotsman (a particularly hotly contested field) followed by the (literally) bouncy cast of “we will rock you”. I think I need another sip of that Duvel.

Duvel Update wed evening: it's a new fromDuvel that's not as strong as normal Duvel and so more refreshing to drink and sadly only on draught in ABO :(

This weekend I have been mostly

....Standing at the bottom of the Post Office Tower.

On Sunday after getting shorn and having several annoying conversations with the gizmo sellers of TCR (as no one calls it) “look mate they do make them, I saw them on the internet, no they were 14 quid not 120, well if you are sure don’t want my money, no I don’t want a usb dongle my last dose has only just cleared up…."

Anyway after being ignored by the high priests of geekdom in Maplin et al I decided to get some air and a thought struck me. I have recently been privy to some secret plans of the post office tower (I can’t divulge anything yet but soon very soon I promise).

I decided to go and stand at the bottom of it and crick my neck, anyway after some wandering around with the tower doing its white rabbit thing; disappearing and reappearing I found it. Cleveland Muse is the nearest you’ll get to it and there it is. I’ll avoid too many penile similes but the Muse is the only place you can see it base to tip, it’s on a nice dramatic sixties plinth.

Sadly after Billy Butlins made a hash of the revolving restaurant (and not the tasty sort with a fried egg on the top) and some local difficulties with the boys from across the water and a bomb, it’s been closed for ages which is a shame. The views would be as good as the eye, almost as good as Greenwich Park!

Now that we renationalising stuff can’t we nick the tower back off boring rip off BT and let the discerning public back in.

I thought about posting some tunes thinking the new tower should have house band, I thought Stereo Lab and Broadcast could have residences and Burial could do club sets for da kids early Monday morning or when ever proper clubbers go out.

I think we should have a proper singer but which would you have?

Anyway the music on this film from 1960’s (did we really need the “swinging” bit added Ms V& A curator.) is marvelous.

My fave bit apart from the diagrams is where the technician goes on his break and eats his egg mayonnaise in a stark empty canteen.

London calling indeed.

If you want to hear some tunes why not try .

http://www.myspace.com/stereolab

http://www.myspace.com/broadcastuk

Autumn Leaves

Turn, Turn, Turn....

I was reading my book the other day (see pic below) over lunch and a leaf fell on it, now I’m not very superstitious part from when it comes to trees (Richard Dawkins will give me a kicking next time he sees me know) ; so I took this to be good Omen and made a wish and it came true !

Me and Winona are getting married next in Vegas and our first case of Tunnock's Caramels just arrived.

The book I was reading is by Neil Gaiman & P Craig Russell it’s called "Coraline" and it’s really rather good about a young girl who goes into that cupboard in the corridor and ends up with another mum who has buttons for eyes. It’s creepy but wonderfully told and the drawings good too.

"Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower"

Albert Camus

Here are a couple versions of possibly the most wistful song ever written. Nat King Cole is a great singer sadly with the weight of easy listening on his shoulders, but any fool can hear great singing when it come along, the other tune is the Coldcut mid ‘90’s “trance” version which is rather good too.

On the subject of leaves you do know why they change colour in autumn don’t you?

Well that’s because leaves aren’t really green, they really a sort of translucent brown. It’s like this; imagine them as being made out of beige glass. The green colour comes from Chlorophyll (the most important compound in the world?) and every spring the new leaves are flooded with chlorophyll hence the greenness. In autumn the thrifty trees save the chlorophyll sucking it out of the leaves and into their trunks and roots storing it over the winter.

Why do leaves go yellow and red then?
Well light comes in lots of forms (wavelengths) some of its green some it red and yellow so the trees produce a range of "Phylls" to capture different forms of light. Chlorophyll’s greenness tends to mask the other compounds colours, being the most “important” light absorber Chlorophyll gets saved first leaving behind the yellow and red looking compounds which in turn get reabsorbed leaving the brown shell of leaves to rot and decay.

One last “science bit” remember that trees are just tubes of water and sugar held up by air (well the CO2 part of the air) mixed with some nitrogen and water. They are truly magical the closest we have to proper alchemy, they are literally solid air.

Autumn Leaves Nat King Cole mp3

Autumn Leaves Coldcut (Irresitable force mix) mp3

This week I am mostly......

Things that are just good:

the hot Italian sausages they sell in Exmouth market.